This week we find Ben and his harem in San Francisco to get in on the treat everyone’s always talking about.  You’re probably thinking Rice-A-Roni but I’m talking about a whole lotta lip-lockin’…yup, if you thought week two was full of it, just know Mumbles was counting kisses this episode and it was up around 8. [I know it is extremely unromatic of me but does anyone else wonder if the participants on this show have to disclose if they have any communicable diseases?  All I keep wondering when I see him – or any of the Bachelors/Bachelorettes – making out with multiple people is whether he just contracted herpes. And then gave it to someone else. And then the next… Seems like they should be sending the girls home in the limo with prescriptions for at-home treatment.]

I digress. Back to the show. Ben’s sister is here to have a little chit chat – her name is Julie and I think she looks a bit like Khloe Kardashian minus the millions and the Spanx. During their coffee shop convo he divulges that he thinks Jennifer the number cruncher is the best kisser.  

One-on-one date: “love lifts us up.”
Emily

Having stated in the hotel room that she is deathly afraid of heights, when Emily finds out her first date with Ben will be climbing to the top of the Bay Bridge, she clearly wants to die. Says so herself.  At our house we simultaneously raise eyebrows and let out a little yelp/chuckle of sadness/fear/empathy for the poor girl when we realize this date has not been set up by an adventure climbing company or some extreme sport group but rather…CalTrans. How romantic.

Back at the hotel room, Jennifer uses the telescope to find Ben and Emily stalled on the bridge. [Cue collective outbursts from the jealous girls.]  While Emily contemplates her death by plunge, Ben decides to cure her fears with a kiss. She smiles, they scream it out and trudge on up to the top. 

Quite profoundly, Emily has changed her perspective on heights noting, “A bridge takes two things that are separate and brings them together,” and likens that to her and Ben’s lives.

At a waterfront dinner with views of the bridge, Emily confesses that she’s had some abysmal dating experiences including getting matched by an online dating service with her older brother. Awkward. Funny, but awkward.

Ben explains that his father loved his mother and he always said she was smarter than he was, so Ben thinks it appropriate to carry on that tradition with Emily, the doctor. He gives her the rose, they drink champagne, and the fireworks show starts – a private show, but not private enough that it doesn’t make all the girls press their noses to the window in jealousy back at the hotel.

Group date: “Let’s cross something off our leap list.”
Blakeley, Jaclyn, Casey S., Erika, Samantha, Jamie, Elyse, Monica, Rachel, Nicki, Kacie B.

After piling in their Honda-sponsored little SUVs with skiis on top, the girls hike up a San Fran hill in inappropriate footwear and fluttery dresses to find a street shut down and covered with snow.  Snow skiing down a San Fran hill street…in bikinis!  Definitely think Ben put this on his “Producers, make this happen for me” list.  Kacie B is by far the cutest – girl can’t ski at all but she is all smiles and just darling coming down the hill backwards, butt up in the air, falling all over herself. 

I hate the alone time Rachel and Ben have. Gross.

Kacie and Ben take a stroll outside. Ben says she sparkles. Ben says she’s trouble. Good trouble. They kiss a lot.

Blakeley looks way better without makeup. Ben gives her some strong advice: be nice and try to make friends.

Ben gives the rose to Rachel. Woof. She reminds me of this actress.

One-on-one date: “let’s unlock our key to the city.”
Brittney

Brittney is utterly shocked when the date card is read aloud and her name is on it.  Everyone assumed Lindzi would get the date because she got the first impression rose but has yet to go on a date.  Commentary from Mumbles: “Brittney gets confused when she gets asked out on a date after going on a dating show….this chick isn’t going to last long.” 

 After much internal dispute, restless furrowing of the eyebrows and some tears about how hard it is to be on this show, Brittney says her heart isn’t in it, packs her bag, says bye to the girls, and tells the camera that she needs to leave…forever. She struts into the group date with her luggage and interrupts the evening to tell Ben she is leaving. He puts her in a cab and tells her to say hi to her grandma. Well now, isn’t this something.  A little down and out about getting rejected before even going on the date, the bright side is Ben is now free to rendezvous with someone else and that someone is…Lindzi.  Yay, consolation date!

 Fill-in One-on-one date: “let’s see San Fran at night.” 
Lindzi

Lindzi and Ben take a trolley car around the city, grab some ice cream, go through Chinatown, and use that key Brittney must have given back to unlock city hall.  Inside the deserted building is Matt Nathanson (Mumbles whispers “who?” and I don’t know either) is playing live so they dance and kiss.

 After the concert they head to the seedy Tenderloin neighborhood and use the password to get into Bourbon & Branch, an awesome speakeasy with fabulous libations…it just so happens to be where my best girlfriends and I started my bachelorette weekend extravaganza – see the photo proof here. [P.S. It is news to us that they serve food because we drank our dinner then got AMAZING pizza from a hole-in-the-wall place when we left.]

 To end their night, the couple pops into a piano store so Ben can impress Lindzi with his romantic piano playing. It works.  It kinda works on me and Mac, too.  Good song choice. Plus, glossy red piano?  Yes, please!

 Cocktail Party
The drama continues when a mystery lady calls Chris to let him know that she is on her way to San Francisco so Ben can fall in love with her. She sounds like a crazy and when she gets out of the car, it’s Shawntel the funeral director from Brad’s season. Oddly she says she’s really confident that she’s going to be with Ben forever. Makes us think that perhaps Shawntel and Ben had a little rendezvous of their own.

Jennifer the good kisser gets more tongue time with Ben. He says she’s still got it.

Interesting musings from Courtney:

• “Blakeley is the kind of girl that your boyfriend cheats on you with.”  [True]
• In saying that she has the best connection with Ben and he should send everyone else home – her choice of words: “it’s time to trim the fat.” A bit ironic coming from a model, but probably intended to be a dig at the non-model ladies in the room.  And by that I mean everyone else.

Ben takes Courtney up to the roof and they exchange “I like you”s and “I like you a lot”s. And then some saliva.

 Elyse is awful and a little soprano/jersey shore-esque (or maybe the show where they are hairdressers?). What I’m sure was a very enlightening conversation was abruptly interrupted by the funeral director’s arrival. Shawntel waltzes on into the suite and sends the other women into a frantic frenzy.  Shawntel says and Ben agrees that yes, they have in fact talked before but he still can’t figure out why she is here. [Side note because girls are flipping out and crying and having little tantrums: I understand it’s upsetting to have more competition come in, but Brittney just left so it’s like there is an opening…right?]  Ben seems intrigued by Shawntel but fears he might upset some of the girls he has his heart set on sleeping with kissing getting to know better if he allows her to stay.  All the girls give Shawntel the third degree, tears are shed, and Chris announces the cocktail party is over. 

Roses
Courtney (who makes it known that she is not happy about Shawntel and will not accept this type of behavior moving forward.)
Kacie B.
Elyse
Jamie
Jennifer, the good kisser
Casey S.
Blakeley
Monica
Nicki
Samantha
…
[Erika passes out]
…And with one rose left, Ben apologizes to Erika, Jaclyn and Shawntel and tells them that he will not be giving out the final rose tonight. Jaclyn is the third girl this season to lock herself in the bathroom to cry. Shawntel is a mess. And later we find out why Ben was so quick to let Erika go: she’s destined to be with the newly single “Guard and protect your heart” Kasey.  Erika reveals a tattoo on the inside of her lip. Super classy.

Next week
Park City, UT is next up on the trip so Ben and the ladies can experience the outdoors. Emily puts her fate on the line by crossing Courtney and revealing her double sidedness to Ben, Jennifer and Ben look to be having a pretty spectacular date, and Ben sends someone home early.  Fun stuff!

 Lots to choose from this episode – what was your favorite part? 

 I’m still on team Kacie B…who’s your fave?