Wouldn’t exactly call spiders my biggest fear but I do really despise them. Weird thing is though, as much as they freak me out, they’re also sort of fascinating. Maybe it’s because my brother had a rose hair tarantula while we were growing up and (aside from the housekeeper who accidentally knocked over Theresa the Tarantula’s little home one day forcing said housekeeper to scream and barricade the door until someone from the family got home), Theresa was quite gentle and non-threatening. In fact, my dad used to go so far as to call her “beautiful” and he sure did get a kick out of taking her for “walks” in the backyard. My dad’s a funny guy.
For as much as I hate spiders and the alarm and anxiety they cause when I encounter them, you think I’d be all about killing them. Unfortunately, I just can’t muster up the courage to kill bugs – part crunch factor and part “what if it jumps at me or survives my act of attempted murder and comes after me in full force?” This is especially troubling when Mumbles is out of town and I must resort to finding a can of bug spray/hair spray/anything that will kill it so I don’t physically have to squish it or get within close range. I’ll never forget living in the sorority house and lying in bed seeing little things dangling from the ceiling (about a dozen baby spiders – gross) and then a few days later sitting at my desk and out of the corner of my eye spotting a furry legged dark spider on the wall. Just about died of shock, I did. And what could I do but run downstairs in hysterics begging anyone to come kill it for me, only to be forever traumatized by not finding aforementioned monster when returning to my room? Sleep with one eye open is right. Geez.
Here’s another thing about spiders: I’m pretty sure they have a worldwide web (ha! see what I did right there?!) that lets all of them know who their fearful prey are, who they can most easily taunt and torture with their creepy crawly i-have-too-many-legs wily ways.
I’m only saying all this because I discovered a bite on my abdomen which means [I shudder to even think!] there’s probably a spider in my bed. GROSS. Mumbles gets home tonight and you can bet we’ll be fogging our place when we go out of town this weekend. Eww.
Here’s another one of AT&T’s great commercials – just picture me playing the part of the demure red head and imagine my dad taking that bad boy of a spider for a walk instead of smashing it into smithereens.
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